Chapter 74
1006words
After fifteen minutes through the busy traffic, I am finally home. I open the door to my condo.
"Honey, I'm home." I got no response so I place the keys on the hook that is on the wall and started to loosen my tie. "Honey, Where are you, sweetheart?" I walked around until I reach the living hall. As I spot her a smile immediately came to my face but soon disappear when I notice her, her face was red and puffy and she was crying. I quickly ran to her side to know what was wrong.
I bend on my knees to her level, I cup her hands in my palm. "What's wrong, my love?"
She stayed silent but the tears still falling. "Tell me, darling. Why are you crying? Did something bad happen? Hmm, love. What happened?" I looked at her distress face. I don't like to see her looking this sad at all. I really want to know what's wrong but she refused to tell me. I don't know what to do to make her stop crying. Seeing her cry makes me want to cry too. It hurts.
"Please tell me what's wrong, Seeing you like this hurts me, please why are you crying? Did something bad happen while I was gone?" I look at her pleading for a reply. Neither was she answering but she wasn't looking at me either, although my hands were cupping her face, her eyes were looking somewhere else. She was avoiding my gaze.
"Please, Please tell me," I beg. I need to know who made her cry so I can show them a piece of me.
"I remember." She finally spoke, her voice barely audible.
"What exactly do you remember?" I asked, my voice a little shaky.
"Everything." I look at her and slowly release my hands from her cheeks. She remembers being hurt by me. She remembers, of course, she does! I knew that this moment would come but this isn't how I had imagined it. I imagine her smiling, not crying.
"What now?" I spoke not really knowing what else to say. What now? "Where do we go from here?"
"Nowhere."
I raised my brows. "What do you mean?" I swallowed. What exactly does she mean?
She sighed then after a couple of seconds after she took a deep breath. "We're not going anywhere because I'm leaving. I can't stay with you after you've hurt me so much."
I look at her shock, "No."
She got up from the chair and moved away from me. I got up after her. No, she wasn't leaving her.
"No, You're not leaving me. You love me as I love you."
"No, Alex. You've hurt me too much, I can't stay. I have to leave."
I walked to where she was and held her soft hands in mine. "Please don't," my voice whimpered.
"I have to. You know you I felt being thrown off of someone's house. How it feels to have that one person you love throwing a loaded suitcase at you? I sprained my foot, it stayed like that for over two weeks. Do you know how it feels to walk on a road with a suitcase? Do you know how it feels to have a migraine for days because you were up crying? Do you know it feels to cry yourself to sleep every night because the person you love doesn't trust you? Do you know how it felt when you hurt me? Do you know how it feels to keep getting hurt by persons who you love? Well, let me tell you. It hurts, it hurts like hell."
Her tears running down her cheeks with shame and so were mine. I know that I hurt her, I know.
"I know that I've hurt you but please, please, please forgive me."
"I don't think I can forgive you. I've been hurt too much to have myself being hurt one more time."
"But I promise I won't hurt you. I won't, I love you. You are my heart. Why can't you see that? I'll never hurt you again. I love you with every fibre of my being." I used the back of my hands to wipe my tears. She needs to see that she is my one true love, my only love. "Please. Please, we'll get married and we'll raise our babies at home in LA. Just please forgive me."
"I can't." she looked down.
"Please," I shout and plea at the same time. "You promised. You promise you'll never leave me then don't. Keep your promise."
We walked to the direction of the door. "A promise is a comfort to a fool"
I sigh and look at her, not knowing what to really say.
"My sister and Santiago will get my bags for me"
"So you're telling me you forgave her but not me."
"She's my sister, my twin sister. We're bond for life. We are all imperfect and we make mistakes. She made a mistake."
"So did I and I'm begging you to forgive me for it."
"I'm sorry, but I can't. I just can't. Goodbye Alexander." She walked to the direction of the door. I heard it open close. I stood there waiting, maybe waiting for it to be open but I never did.
So this is what it feels to have your heartbroken.
..
I brought the glass of Vodka mixed with Campari to my nose then to my lips and drank it all at once. The strong liquids made me cough.
